(217): just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good

(778): Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.

(916): Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room

(401): You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.

(516): They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.

(530): Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.

(330): I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.

(727): I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"

Lifehouse's Everything Skit

Stolen from my little sisters friend...

Being Christian doesn't mean God is going to make your life perfect, it means that he is going to give you struggles and burdens to bear to show how strong you really are. We have to go through our worst of days to deserve our best of days ♥

Bust the windows out your car for some chicken

If you look at me and feel the urge to ask, "Are you ok?", please don't.  There is a 95% chance that I am about to start crying.

In fact, as I was walking around campus today, I was actually thankful that I couldn't see the pitying looks on the faces that passed me by.  They were probably concerned that I would fall asleep and walk into the street.  But all I had to do was think about someone possibly asking "Are you ok?" and I started sniffling.

Being emotional sucks.  Being this exhausted sucks.  Not being able to see when I wear glasses is apparently a blessing in disguise.

The end.

20 Awesomely Untranslatable Words from Around the World

20 Awesomely Untranslatable Words from Around the World

Do not tell me that I should be treated like a princess if you aren't willing to do so.  Stop giving me hopes for things that do not happen.  Real trust isn't even in my vocabulary anymore.  I automatically assume that everybody is too drunk, too distracted, too uninterested to actually follow through with their intentions.

I am tired of guys being nice to fulfill their agenda.  This has defined every relationship that I have ever had.  Ya know, "nice" guys doing nice things trying to get some type of reaction from me... and when I finally decide that they are worth my time, they bail.  It was the chase.  I'm so tired of running.  I'm exhausted.